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Post by delilah mari barnes on May 8, 2010 0:35:54 GMT -5
Her heels clicked a bit as she moved her long legs so she was much more comfortable. It was way too cold to be out in the attire she was in but she had a jacket on so she figured she was fine. She wore some shorts (yes she knew it was winter) and an antique white tunic that was loose on her slender frame. Some heels were on her feet and, okay, she wasn't wearing the jacket. It was a varsity jacket belonged to Bellamy that she stole from God knows and since it was cold out and she needed something to keep her warm that was what she had to work with. Plus, the shorts were Bellamy's too. They were pretty short so that much was expected. Despite looking like she was ready for summer, she did look good...
Just out of place sitting on church steps at three in the morning having a cigarette.
The eighteen year old looked a bit tired as she leaned back using a step as a rest to prop herself on her elbows. She had her legs crossed at the knees and she sucked on her cigarette, the pack sticking out from her purse down by her feet. Her phone had been on silent for the past couple of days and for reasons she would much rather keep to herself. She knew all the rumors that she and Bellamy were official and, well, they might as well be true. They weren't technically official but they definitely acted like it. Delilah just knew better than to trust someone with a reputation like Bell's...but she did like...a lot. Plus, lesbian sex? Yeah, she tried it with Bell and she wondered if that counted as her losing her virginity...It wasn't like they used a strap on...Apparently she left it at her house in Sicily or something so they basically did other things instead...Maybe she just lost her lesbian virginity...Either way, Delilah was somewhat content with her situation despite practically ignoring Dresdan again and officially dropping her class with him to be placed in another. She changed most of her schedule purely because she didn't want to run into him unless necessary. The tension killed her, to be perfectly honest. He said he was sorry that one day and she hadn't been able to say anything back other than a measly 'okay' and then move on with her life. She still felt the tension and realized, now, he felt it too and to make things easier on the both of them she figured just staying away was the best plan.
Plus it lead her to Bellamy whose dorm she just left to go for a walk and a smoke about half an hour ago which lead her to the church steps. She was dead tired...They had just gotten to her dorm after some party and Delilah still had alcohol, cigarettes, and Bell's perfume clinging to her skin, hair, and clothing. She loved her perfume...It was sweet and addicting much so like the woman who wore it. Running her fingers through her bed messy hair that was usually brushed to perfection, she took another drag looking out at the street where nothing was really happening other than the occasional pigeons flying down. She wanted to see him...No, she was yearning for it but everytime his face came up, Bellamy's groans...her blunt way of saying things...her soft skin and smooth dark hair...But then Dresdan's smile, his laughter...
She was confused beyond belief and it would explain why she was slightly inebriated, smoking like a chimney, and now digging through her bag for those prescription pills she stole from the medical wing this morning. Popping it open, she popped four into her mouth and swallowed them dry with no problem since she was well used to this. If she was high and intoxicated she would be fine and not think about Bell or Dres and with the cigarettes she'd stay calm since they basically became her stress reliever. No longer the Virgin Mary and well on her way to finally living her life...
But nothing good ever lasted forever. Not youth, not love, not parties; nothing but whatever you leave behind and she planned on doing so over the course of her lifetime. She was just hoping she would find some form of tranquil happiness along the way.
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Post by dresdan marc barnes on May 10, 2010 17:15:30 GMT -5
He didn't know what to feel; what to think. Nothing was working, life wasn't working. His lungs felt vapid, as if the air had been permenantly sucked from them, rendering them useless and hollow in his chest. It was that feeling that clutches your insides and strips them raw of sensations the second your ears are forced to hear, to pay witness to something you never wanted to know, never knew was possible. It usually passed within a day, yet Dresdan had not been so lucky, suffering from this strange spell of shock and awe and a sense of betrayal for the last five days, since the second he had heard his parents over winter break. Their voices hushed beneath the fall of evening as they prepared for a party in their bedroom, the gentle clink of icecubs in a glass of scotch he could picture in his father's hand; the swish of his mothers gowns as she sped around the room getting ready. Dres had only been passing, heading down the hallway as he adjusted his cufflinks, feeling disjointed and aggravated by the fact that he was forced to endure yet another dinner party. It was bad enough that he had to sit there making conversation with his parent's coworkers, but the fact that Delilah had bailed completely on coming home with him only annoyed him further; there was no one to pass despairing glances to or to nudge beneath the table
So there he stood upon the landing, adjusting his cuffs and paying only half attention to the sound of his mother's voice just beyond the cracked door. He hadn't quite been listening, until Deli's name came up, gruff upon his father's authoratitive voice as he said quite suddenly; "We need to tell them what happened. We need to tell her she's adopted." From there, his mother tutted and excused, but Dresdan remained statue still, now barely listening for the sound of blood gushing through his skull at a dangerous rate managed to drown out the rest of the conversation. The only thought that could formulate was horror, and the repetive words spinning through his mind; "Adopted. Deli's adopted. I love her, and she's adopted, and I want her."
Thought process had not changed so much since the arrival back to school, to be greeted with the sickening tales of everyone else's break, gritting his teeth as he listened to this girl chatter about the beach or his guy friends gloat over their latest exotic conquest. When asked about his own vacation, he had only shrugged, mumbled and excused himself, much preferring to wallow in his thoughts privately, thoughts that only circulated about Delilah and an aching desperation to find her. Last he had heard, she and Bellamy were all but tied at the hip, having spent a glorious few days in Jamaica, and since they had been barely seen without one another, making it nearly impossible to speak to his supposed 'twin'. The younger, brunette lesbian was always just around the corner, her vibrant green eyes watchful and suspicious, whisking Delilah's attention away the second she seemed aware of Dresdan's approach. It was vexating, and he had disliked Bellamy enough before as it was, but this had sent him over the edge into total loathing. Somehow, that skank had seduced his beloved Delilah into a false stupor, and now she held a bigger claim over her. Delilah trusted her, not Dresdan; Delilah could openly be with Bellamy, but not with him. The fucking rugmuncher held the advantage on this one and nothing irritated him more.
So here he was, skulking around the dark streets, having ended up near the Cathedral, who's grounds he wandered aimlessly and without purpose; chain-smoking and cursing and generally slinking about with no idea where to go, or what to say, or who to see. He had never felt quite so lost, endlessly amazed by the fact that he the girl he had fallen for, whom had been the largest source of tension in his life for the last year, was of no relation to him; that the infinite abundance of disgust and guilt he had felt was in fact void, null, unneeded. It opened the doors of so many possibilities, gave hope where it seemed there would be nothing but despair and a helpless awkwardness. And he had no idea where to go from here. Would he tell her, so they could be together? Or continue the guise as brother and sister and simply bury these feelings -- feelings that were now justified that they held no blood link? Or was it still sick? They had been raised as brother and sister, in his mind she had been his sister, but this hadn't prevented the attraction.. one that was chemical, emotional, intoxicating, one that surely he wouldn't of felt if they were actually related? There were too many questions that he couldn't answer, and the more mind exposed them, the further he seemed to sink. Unshaven, scruffy, blonde hair, blue eyes sunken into his features. He hardly looked the man he had been just a mere three weeks ago.
"Ugh, fuck." The words were spit from his lips as he came to the steps, taking another lungful, seering drag off his cigarette and glowering about the shadowed courtyard. IT was only then that eyes connected with another figure, dressed far too exposingly given the slight chill to the weather, sucking on a cigarette as if it's toxins were in fact nourishing. Delilah. She looked different, harder somehow, but it was still her, still recognizable to eyes that had been desperately searching for her for days. Immediately did he glance elsewhere, looking for the tiny five foot two shadow that was the ever constant Bellamy, but she was nowhere to be found. For once, Deli was on her own. Knees felt weakened, trembling briefly beneath him before sucking in a large breath of uncontaminated air. Tugging in his last remains of direction and confidence, Dresdan approached with his usual laid back swagger, lazy smile expanding across his lips as if it had only been hours since he'd last spoken to her, rather than weeks.
"Hey, you."
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Post by delilah mari barnes on May 10, 2010 17:58:42 GMT -5
Finishing her cigarette, she stabbed it out on the steps, tossing it in one direction, only to pull out another and light it up, taking a nicotine filled drag and blowing the smoke out just as she heard a greeting. She had been looking up at the stars when she heard that familiar voice and with ease she glanced over in the direction, a soft smile falling on her face. She had been so wrapped up with Bellamy and trying to avoid him-for his own good-that she hadn't realized just how much she missed him until she was alone for a few moments or in class on her own. Not like she was in class much lately...too busy either sleeping in with Bell or going out and getting ready to party for the night. So when she saw him, she seemed to perk up from her somewhat lazy look, standing and going down the steps to meet him at the bottom, and pulling him into a deep hug as if she had been longing to do that for a while now, "Hey, D," she chuckled, pulling away to take another drag then click the ashes away, "Heard mum and dad were total dildos over the break," her thick British accent slipped out as she chuckled.
She seemed so at ease, probably because she was still a tad bit tipsy from earlier in the night, "You could have just call you know," moved a strand of his hair back behind his hair and out of his beautiful face, "I would have left Jamaica and came to save you, yeah?" as the soft and chilly wind blew, she seemed oblivious to it despite the light display of goosebumps on her slender arms. She felt tired...It wasn't just the partying and constantly being stuck to Bellamy like they were Siamese twins or something. She had been taking more of those anti depressants so she could stay on top of her game in school. She didn't want her grades to suffer as a consequence of her newly found social life but it was catching up with her. She had those light pink eyelids that were an obvious sign of insomnia from staying up to catch up with school work she was missing out on.
Her mind seemed to always drift to Dresdan over the break, though. She could only imagine what he went through with their parents...It wasn't like they were bad people...It was mainly their mother that seemed to constantly tell Delilah to stop being basically who she was. She always seemed rude and judgmental toward the blond and Delilah couldn't help but feel alienated about it. Their father would just pretend to be oblivious to it or look at her in some sort of apologetic manner as if she weren't his daughter and just a guest subjected to all of his wife's pure and utter bullshit, "I missed you," she said softly after a few moments. She did. Terribly. It was strange not having him around but she had a distraction and though she knew damn well he didn't approve of the distraction, she did. She did like Bellamy with all her faults and all her baggage. She wasn't just some slut as everyone said...She was more than that...
At least Delilah tried to find that in her...Always trying to figure her out and see the depth to her and she did, on some kinds of levels, "But I couldn't go see mum and dad...And Bells offered, ya know? I can't just say no to my girlfriend...and it was probably for the better...With everything going on," she chuckled dryly, rambling probably because she was a bit on the intoxicated side...more intoxicated by the pills than the actual alcohol she washed them down with, "Plus mum said she didn't want me home. Something about you getting a bad grade or something and that I should have tutored you and that if I wasn't busy off being a slut I would have noticed?" she said it as if indifferent to it and it was true. It seemed like lately she had been immune to everything their parents scolded her for. Bleh. It wasn't worth saying anymore, "You look like shit by the way..." she really needed to shut up but she just kept rambling a bit, "You okay? Coming home from a late night, ey?" she winked at him though deep down she was hoping he wasn't...Dear God she was only like this because of the crap she took. At least she wasn't swaying. That would suck.
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